Saturday, November 27, 2010

You're Crazy, Ryuuka - Prince

'So, what shall we do now Prince? Are we going to piss Ryuuka again?', I asked.

Prince shurgged his head, 'We'll take a break today and tonight. But tomorrow, we will again', he grinned.

'Right...', I look at Laurence who just went out of our room, 'Wow... you're pretty dressed sweetheart, do we have an unschedule date? Prince said we don't have to go and irritate Ryuuka', I smiled sweetly.

But Laurence looked like he's not paying attention to whatever I'm saying and so I approached him and held on to his hands, 'Laurence? You okay?', I asked.

Prince looked at Laurence, 'Are you sick?'

Laurence sighed, 'No... I'll just go outside and stroll around. I want to do some sight seeing'.

'Great, I'll come with you', I told him.

He looked at me, 'Alone...'

I pulled away, 'Everything okay? Are we okay?', I hesitantly asked.

Laurence nodded, 'I just need some time alone if that's fine'.

I wondered but then I said, 'Yeah yeah sure, go ahead...'

'Thank you, just message if me something's wrong', he said as he went off.

'All right that's weird', Prince spoke.

'Yeah...'

'Did you do something wrong Shin?'

'No... no'.

'Are you sure?'

I looked at Prince.

'Right... maybe he wasn't satisfied to your performance last night?', he chuckled.

'Shut up, we didn't do it', I answered.

'Oh?', he grinned, 'Then maybe he's seeing someone else...'

'What?', I exclaimed.

'CHILL! I was just kidding... man, come on!', Prince quipped.

'Don't you ever joke that way...'

'Yeah yeah... I apologize', Prince mumbled.

Time passed by so swiftly that Prince and I didn't discern that it's already dinner time.

'Where's Laurence?', I asked.

'He said...'

'I know... but is strolling around will eat all your time?'

Prince shrugged his shoulder, 'I'm starving... let's eat now please?'

'You go ahead, I'll wait for him'. Then someone opened up our door and it was Laurence. I almost jump out of my feet and greeted him, 'Hey sweetheart!'

Laurence was speechless.

'Laurence?', I greeted him again.

'Oh... hey', he said, 'Were you saying something?'

'I was just greeting you'.

'Right... I'll take my shower', he said as he started to walk.

I grabbed his wrist, 'You don't look like you're okay'.

'I'm okay... I'm just tired, I walked and walked around the city. Photograph some nice sceneries'.

I nodded.

He pulled his wrist back, 'If you don't mind'.

'How about dinner?'

'Not hungry'.

Laurence went inside the bathroom and I sit with Prince who was just looking at us a while ago.

'He seems like he's not okay', Prince told me.

'Obviously', I answered.

'Well you better leave him alone...'

'Huh?'

'You see... he's like pushing you away, that means he doesn't you to hang around with him for now. Maybe give him some time, perhaps he really does need some time alone. Don't be a nagger'.

I nodded.

Then Prince opened the television, 'Let's watch some news...'

I nodded.

Laurence went out of the bathroom, 'Shin... if it's okay, would you sleep with your cousin tonight? Just for tonight'.

'Ugh...', I mumbled.

'Sure he doesn't mind, right Shin?', Prince looked at me.

'Yeah yeah...', I nodded.

'Thank you', Laurence uttered and entered our room.

'Prince?'

'Don't be a nagger', he repeated his advice.

After watching a few movies, Prince and I decided to go to sleep. But I told him that I want to see Laurence first. I went to our room and I saw him asleep in our bed. I glanced at him and kissed his lips. As I was to go out, I saw his laptop still opened and I looked at it. There was draft e-mail that is sent to XV's address. I read his message:

Hey XV.

I saw Leader a while ago and he's completely destroyed. I learned that he is sick. This is the full scenario how I knew.

I went out this morning because the last time I saw XXVII. He's face was like puzzled. I can't really distinguished what he's really thinking or feeling so that's why I looked out for him. It was 10 in the morning here when I saw him eating at the diner. I approached him.

'Hey XXVII', I greeted him.

'Hey VII', he greeted me back, 'Where's your lover and your friend?'

I sat opposite to him, 'I left them in the hotel'.

He nodded, 'Is there anything you need from me?'

I smiled, 'I wish we could talk. Just the two of us, brother'.

'There's nothing we should talk about'.

I nodded, 'I see... do you have plans today?'

'Tonight'.

'Oh, so you could tour me?'

'Why don't you just hire a tour guide?'

I chuckled, 'Can't you?'

He sighed. After eating, we went out, 'So where do you wanna go VII?'

'To the mall'.

He chuckled, 'That's a tourist spot?'

I smiled, 'So, how is it going?', we started to walk.

'Nothing much'.

'Aren't you going to ask about The Numbers?'

He smirked, 'So, how's The Numbers doing?'

'Never the same'.

He nodded, 'You should lead them VII'.

We came accross a bench and we sat there, 'I can never lead them the way you lead us'.

'Well... you should learn how to be me then'.

I shrugged my head, 'You're Ryuuka Shuuichi for fuck sake, no body can ever be like you'.

He chuckled, 'Thank you Arthur Miller'.

I sighed, 'XXVII...'

'Remember when one of The Numbers died before and while all of you were griefing. I told everyone that instead of sulking... we should party and celebrate because he's dead?'

I nodded, 'You said, everyone's eventually going to die so we shouldn't be surprise and besides, he was suffering so much from his cancer and perhaps it's nature's will to finally end it'.

'Yup, everyone was mad at me that time'.

'Who wouldn't be? I was pissed too'.

'I know'.

'Why are yoy saying this Leader?'

'I'm no longer your leader so stop calling me that'.

'You are still and will always be'.

'A lot of things used to be', he said as he lit a cigar.

I looked at me and he looked at me too.

'I shouldn't said what I said that day...'

'It's too late to realize that you know'.

He nodded.

'But not that you were wrong... you were absolutely right, everyone of us will eventually die', I uttered as I Iit a cigar too, 'It was just the way you said it'.

'But still... I shouldn't have said that'.

'Then why didn't you?', I blew my smoke.

He blew his smoke too, 'Maybe because I didn't know that I was dying that day'.

I looked at him, 'What?', and exclaimed.

'You'll gonna make me say it twice?', he blew his smoke.

'I just want to be sure that I...'

'You heard it'.

'Shit! Fuck!', I threw my cigarette butt, 'Why didn't you tell me... us?'

'I didn't tell it to anyone'.

'So why are you telling me now?'

'So you could forgive me for running away just like that. Putting you all the responsibility I left'.

I sighed, 'You son of a bitch...'

He smiled, 'Thank you'.

'What is it? How? Tell me everything'.

He sighed, 'Just promise me... never say anything to Prince'.

I nodded.

'It was my last mission in Singapore that I got this'.

'That was a success mission, right?'

'It was... but somehow, they injected me something. It's a drug, still unknown... that will slowly eat all my reflex muscle and soon will make my body numb. I won't feel anything, then... after the drug will go up to my brain and suck up all my neurons'.

'That means...'

He nodded, 'That's right... I'll soon be paralyzed. After my body became numb, it will be paralyzed. I wouldn't be able to move, feel or do anything... I'll be practically dead. As the drug continues it's adventure in my body, and go to the finish line, my heart will stop pumping blood and just like a snap, I'll be a cold corpse'.

'Fuck...', I held on my forehead.

'Come on VII... don't look like you're disappointed'.

'XXVII!', I exclaimed.

'By the way, as the drug is circulating in my body... it does something else'.

'What is it?'

He looked at me and smirked, 'It's hideous but it's the truth... I lost interest in sex'.

'Huh?', I wondered.

'My chances are 20:80'

'20 is?'

'My chance of staying alive'.

'No fucking way!'

He smiled, 'Anyway... you wanna go to the mall right? Just walk straight there and you'll see a mall', and stood up.

'Where you going?', I asked.

'Home... I'm getting tired', he said as he left me.

I walked down the aisle and follow his instruction. I spend an hour in the mall doing nothing. I kept thinking about him, and so I rode a taxi and went to his place.

I knocked and knocked at his door. I knocked about ten times, 'XXVII! XXVII! XXVII!'.

Finally, his door opened. I looked at him shocked, 'Jesus...'

'Why are you here?', he asked with a very weak voice.

'We just parted ways about an hour ago and... you look like shit'.

He sighed.

'You should be in bed', I told him.

'I was... but, someone kept knock knock knocking at my fucking door!', he exclaimed.

I went to his kitchen.

'What are you doing?', he asked.

'I'm making you some soup', I answered as I opened his fridge and saw nothing, 'There's nothing in here but beers and poppers'.

'All the essentials', he uttered.

'Well...', I grabbed a pen and a paper, 'I'll stock up some groceries for you and while I'm here, I'll do your laundry...'

'VII...'

'Is there anything you request? You like bacon right? Anymore cravings? Mushroom soup?'

'VII...'

'Oh! Mocha cake?'

'VII!', he yelled.

I stopped and looked at him.

'This is exactly why I didn't want anyone to know, that's why I left and fucked everyhthing in Japan so you guys would be mad at me and will forget about me and the hopes that I will not be treated like I'm invalid or ineffective or weak or I was gonna die!', he exclaimed as he was catching for his breath.

I was speechless.

'So would you get out of here!', he yelled as he threw everything that was in his kitchen table.

I just stared at him, he started to walk slowly towards his bedroom and then I followed him. As I entered his bedroom, I saw him covering his face with a pillow. I sat on his bed and removed it without saying a word.

'What don't you understand about fuck off?', he told me.

'You think you can kick me out of your life like what you did to Prince? And for what... trying not to let on that he knew because that's what you wanted? He deserves to know... he's your lover, you are still his partner whether you want to admit it or not'.

He was not saying anything.

I continued, 'Sick or not, that's a fucking shitty way to treat him'.

'I was only... trying to make it easier', he whispered.

'By never seeing him again?'

'He would left sooner or later anyway, might as well be sooner!', he exlcaimed.

'What are you...', he didn't let me finished.

'Would you just go home!', he shouted at me, 'Go home VII, go home... to your wife and your friends! Leave me alone!', and pushed me hard that I stumbled out of his bed.

I tried to talk to him again but I realize that I shouldn't push my luck anymore and so I left him there lying in his bed alone and enduring all the pain alone. I actually don't know what to do now, I don't know if I should tell Prince about our Leader's condition. Please tell me what to do.

As I finished reading his e-mail, I heard Laurence's voice, 'What are you doing here?'

I looked at him, 'In law's... dying?'

'You have no permission looking at my private stuff'.

'I know but I was just worried, I thought I did something wrong and...'

'You looked at my laptop and read my letter for my sister?'

I sighed, 'I'm sorry Laurence...', and looked down.

'Get out'.

I was shocked and looked at him, 'What did you say?'

'I said get out of this room. Didn't I tell you that I want to spend some time alone?'

'Laurence...'

'Please!', he exclaimed and turned his back to me.

'Prince needs to know!', I exclaimed, 'You said it yourself, he deserves to know...'

He faced, 'Not anymore!'

'What should I know?'

I looked at the door and it was Prince.

'Fuck', Laurence whispered.

'What should I know?', Prince repeated.

And before I reveal the truth, Laurence did.

'Your lover is dying...'

Prince's eyes widened, 'What?'

Laurence explained everything to Prince and even let him ready his e-mail for XV.

'Do you understand Prince?', Laurence asked.

'He kicked me out'.

'Because he doesn't want you to see him in his present condition'.

Prince shrugged his head, 'I don't understand, why will he think that I will leave him?'

'Of all people, you should know better... he thinks that now he's sick, he's dying, that he's no longer perfect... you won't love him anymore. That you'll going to leave him'.

'That's crazy'.

'Prince listened to me... Being young, being the strongest, being wise all the time, being beautiful... being perfect in all ways of life is what being Ryuuka Shuuichi means and if you take that all away...', Laurence sighed, 'Understand what he's going through right now'.

Prince didn't say a word and left our room. He went to his room and locked himself.

'Laurence...'

'Not now Shin', Laurence told me as he went to the veranda and lit his cigar.

I didn't follow him anymore and instead went to our room and sleep. We were all on our selves alone.

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